Wednesday, December 09, 2009

More information than you require about my beard

I'm growing a winter beard. I can't remember when this beard began and I can't say for certain when it will end, but the goal here is to grow my longest beard yet. One that will keep my face warm over these winter months.

As my beard grows, I become increasingly obsessed with its intricacies. I think about my chin, hidden within that mass of hair. It might sound silly, but it's easy to forget that the chin is even there sometimes. I know from previous experience that when this beard finally says so long to this world and finds its resting place in the bathroom wastebasket, I will look in the mirror and think to myself, 'Is this tiny thing really my chin? So small it is.' But for now the chin remains concealed underneath my winter beard.

Occasionally I will pluck a hair or two from my face to gain a better perspective of the beard's true length (roughly two centimetres as of this writing). I'm intrigued by the different types of hair that the beard is made up of. Most are simply long, straight, and brown. Some are so blonde that they are nearly white. These mostly hug the lips around the moustache and soul patch regions. There are others that actually are white. These are easy to spot, within the crowd of straight brown hairs. They give away that I am not as young of a man as I once was.

However, my favourite of the types of hair found on my face is also the rarest. These hairs can only be described as being pubic-like in appearance, only miniature. Jet black, curly, thick, and stubby, they rarely grow longer than a centimetre and thus lie hidden within the greater beard. When I discover one on my face, I will obsessively comb through the beard searching for it, feeling it with my fingers, making sure that it is still there. Eventually, I'll be overcome by the urge to actually see this freakish hair. So, it is plucked for viewing. I examine this strange hair. I roll it around between my index finger and thumb, noticing how it feels not like a hair, but like a thin piece of wire and I wonder why it grew on my face. Then, I slightly regret the fact that I have forcibly removed it from its home. However, there is little that can be done now, but to dispose of this hair and wait for the next of its kind to appear.

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